Dealing with 20-month-old aggression!

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All people are aggressive to varying degrees. As adults, we learn to control these emotions. However, children often show aggression by hitting, biting and scratching others. These behaviors are quite common and usually appear after the child is 1 year old. Parents often have difficulty controlling their child's aggressive behavior.

1. Expression of aggressive children

Tantrums are a normal part of development in children. They occur most often in children between the ages of 1 and 3 years old. But some children have more frequent tantrums than others, while and some children show them less frequently.
Many children have more tantrums before and during language development. Before children express themselves purely verbally, when children feel frustrated, or unsatisfied with something, they may express themselves with tantrums to try to get what they need.
Aggressive children can manifest themselves by actions such as:
Biting others Hitting others or fighting Scratching, scratching and biting are common toddler behaviors, but it is not normal. when children begin to terrorize playmates or others with these behaviors.

1.1. Children bite others

Biting behavior can occur during normal development, but frequent biting can be a sign that your child is having an emotional or behavioral problem.
Between the ages of one and three, many children begin to show aggression by biting others. Biting can be a way for children to test their strength or to get attention.
Some children bite others because they are unhappy, anxious or jealous. Sometimes biting can be caused by exposure to violence through movies, comic books, or in the environment around the child. However, you should keep in mind that teething babies can also bite. Biting is the most common reason children are disciplined in daycare.
When you find a child biting another person, you need to:
Immediately say "no" to the child's behavior, in a calm but firm and disapproving tone. For toddlers (1-2 years old), hold them tightly or keep them in place. To a 2-3 year old, you might say, "biting is not good because it hurts others". Absolutely do not bite children to let them know what it feels like to be bitten. This teaches the child aggressive behavior. If your child continues to show aggression, and he continues to bite others, try discipline. For example, do not hold or play with your child for five minutes after he bites someone else.

1.2. Children fight or hit others

Although some children occasionally fight or hit others, frequent and/or severe aggression may indicate a child has a serious emotional or behavioral problem that needs evaluation and management. suitable reason.
Toddlers and preschoolers often scramble for toys with you. One child can push another child down and take away a toy. If the child cries and walks away, the aggressive child feels successful since getting the toy. It is important to determine whether this pattern occurs in aggressive children.
When you see a child fighting or hitting someone else, you must:
It is more effective to act early if you intervene before the child starts hitting. You can intervene as soon as you feel your child is very upset or upset. When young children fight a lot, it is necessary to supervise them more closely. If a child hits another child, immediately separate the children. Next, try to comfort and care for the other child. Finally, tell the aggressive child: For toddlers (1-2 years old), say: "Don't hit. Hit hurts." To a 2-3 year old, say: "I know you're angry, but don't hit. Hitting hurts." This begins to teach empathy to the child. Never hit a child if he or she is hitting someone else. This teaches the child to use aggressive behavior. Parents should not condone or downplay aggressive sibling fights. When a child frequently fights or hits people, it could be a sign that the child has another problem. The child may be sad or upset, have trouble controlling anger, or may have witnessed violence or may have been a victim of violence at daycare, school, or home. .
Research has shown that children who are aggressive at an early age are more likely to continue this behavior as they get older. Studies also show that children who are regularly exposed to violence and aggression from television, videos and movies act more aggressively.

2. How to teach children to be aggressive

Many toddlers go through an aggressive phase, where it's the adult's job to teach them not to hurt others. The best way to discipline your toddler is to teach them acceptable manners.
Keep a close eye on the child when he or she plays with other children. The moment your child starts hitting, biting, or pushing, remove him from the situation gently but firmly and remind him that hitting is not good. You may have to do this several times before your child stops the behavior. If another child pushes or hits him and you feel he might hit back, distract both children by redirecting them to a new activity. Monitor children closely when they play and be ready to stop them if they are likely to fight. Praise your child when you see him or her doing something cooperative with you, such as sharing toys or playing together calmly. You should never hit your child under any circumstances to teach him a lesson. Some parents do this to show their child "how it feels," thinking that if their child feels hurt, he or she won't hurt others. Unfortunately, this approach often has the opposite effect: If you hit your child (or let someone else hit him), it sends the message that hitting your child is okay. Many parents think that discipline and punishment are the same, but it's not.
Discipline is a way of teaching and also a way to strengthen the good relationship between parents and children. When you discipline, you should praise your child with guidance in a firm tone of voice, with the aim of improving his behavior. Punishment is a negative behavior in which the child suffers the unpleasant consequences of doing or not doing something. Punishment should be only a small part of discipline. Children under the age of 3 often do not understand the concept of punishment. Setting limits is a much better approach than punishment; Most children will respond to setting limits that are clear, calm, and firm.
Some smart and effective discipline tips for age-aggressive kids:
Toddlers: Toddlers are starting to realize what's allowed and what's not but can experiment to see how you react how. You can notice and praise the behaviors your child is allowed to do and ignore the behaviors they are not allowed to do. Redirect to another activity as needed. Tantrums can become more common as children struggle to master new skills and situations. Anticipate triggers for tantrums, like fatigue or hunger, and help them deal with naps and mealtimes. Teach your child not to hit, bite, or use other aggressive behaviors. Model non-violent behavior by not spanking children when they do something wrong. Set limits for your child and be consistent in enforcing limits. Sometimes you need to wait patiently until your child understands and does what you want. Handle sibling conflicts but avoid taking sides. For example, if a fight over a toy arises, you can put the toy away. Preschoolers: Kindergarten-age children are still trying to understand how and why things work and the effects of their actions. As your child learns to behave appropriately, praise him and encourage him to behave the same. Start assigning chores that are age-appropriate, such as putting away toys. Gives simple step-by-step instructions. Reward your child with praise. Teach children how to treat others the way they want to be treated. Explain that it is okay for children to feel angry from time to time, but not to hurt someone or mess things up. Teach your child how to deal with anger in positive ways, such as talking or sharing about what makes him angry. To resolve conflict, remove the source of the conflict.

3. Aggressive children when to see a doctor?

If your child seems unusually aggressive for a few weeks and you can't deal with his behavior on your own, consult your pediatrician. Other warning signs include:
The child's behavior causes bodily harm to himself or others such as: tooth marks, bruises, head injuries. The child attacks you or someone else The child is absent from school or is banned from playing by a neighbor. You worry for the safety of other children. The most important warning sign of aggression is frequency. If young children have persistent problems with fighting, biting or aggressive behavior, parents should seek professional help from a child and adolescent psychiatrist or other mental health professional, who who specializes in the assessment and treatment of behavioral problems in young children.
Nurturing children's emotions is necessary, however, children in the developmental stage are also prone to respiratory problems, respiratory infections, skin diseases and infections. gastrointestinal tract ... parents need to pay special attention to the care and provision of adequate nutrition for children. For children to be healthy and develop well, it is necessary to have a nutritious diet in terms of quantity and quality balance. If children are not provided with adequate and balanced nutrients, it will lead to diseases of excess or lack of nutrients, which adversely affect the comprehensive development of children in terms of physical, mental and motor skills.
Parents should supplement their children with supportive products containing lysine, essential micro-minerals and vitamins such as zinc, chromium, selenium, and B vitamins to help fully meet their child's nutritional needs. At the same time, these essential vitamins also support digestion, enhance nutrient absorption, help improve anorexia, and help children eat well.
Parents can learn more:
Signs of zinc deficiency in children
Micronutrient deficiency and failure to gain weight in children
Please regularly visit Vinmec.com website and update useful information to take care of your child. Take care of the baby and the whole family.
References: babycenter.com, healthychildren.org, aacap.org/