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Children entering parents' bedrooms late at night is a common occurrence, when children wake up in the middle of the night and can't get back to sleep on their own. Children who co-sleep can also have this problem as waking up is a normal part of the human sleep cycle. If it is inconvenient for the child to enter the parent's bedroom when the child is an adult, parents can apply some of the measures shared in the following article.
1. Why do children go to their parents' bedroom late at night without sleeping all night?
Why children do not sleep through the night? This is a question that many parents often ask even when their children have entered elementary school. However, you might be surprised to learn that not a single child, not even an adult, actually sleeps through the night.
Jodi Mindell, author of "Sleeping Through the Night: How Babies, Toddlers and Parents Can Sleep Well," says mid-night awakenings are a normal part of the sleep cycle. human, and those who sleep well will know how to go back to sleep without assistance.
Unfortunately, not all primary school age children can sleep well without assistance, including those who share a bed with their parents. In other words, if your child depends on you, or some other way, to support sleep, he or she may have trouble waking up in the middle of the night again.
Of course, even babies who sleep well can face waking up in the middle of the night. Common anxieties in elementary school age children such as tests, fear of natural disasters, dangers, or relationship problems such as not being invited to birthday parties by you, etc. can cause Sleep becomes an obsession for even children who sleep well.
Nightmares can also cause children to come into their parents' bedroom late at night. Likewise, any act that is different from a child's normal routine, such as a vacation, an illness, or even a change in bedtime can disrupt a child's normal sleep patterns.
The decision to allow children to sleep with parents is a personal decision. There is no psychological or medical disadvantage to this decision. Children who feel more secure and reassured at night are likely to sleep better. And co-sleeping with parents will create closeness, helping children have that sense of security.
2. How to deal with children entering parents' bedroom late at night?
Children can enter the parent's bedroom at 3 a.m., while the parent is asleep. In pajamas, your child may say, "I can't sleep!". If you don't mind the child entering the parent's bedroom, there's no harm in doing so. You will put your baby to bed or help him get back to sleep. However, if you are trying to get your kids into the habit of not going into your parents' room late at night, try the following:2.1. Eliminate sleep aids Some elementary school-age children still have trouble falling asleep even though it's bedtime. Children won't be able to sleep without a stuffed animal, a story, or a parent around. The problem is, without that sleep aid or device when the child wakes up in the middle of the night, the child may have trouble getting back to sleep, which can then result in the child getting into the bedroom. parents .
The proposed solution is to eliminate any sleep aids that prevent the child from being able to manage on his own when he wakes up at night. Author Mindell offers this advice in her book: "When putting your child to bed, leave your child's bedroom exactly as it is in the middle of the night. If you are going to turn off the light, turn it off immediately. White noise or soft music can be played throughout the night. And no matter what bedtime routine a child has to follow, it's imperative that parents leave the room before the child goes to sleep so that the child doesn't wake up wondering why you're not there anymore."
2.2. Be consistent Parents need to make a plan and stick to it. Children entering the parent's bedroom at 3 am can make you very tired. If the child manages to get into the parent's room 1-2 times a week, the child is bound to keep trying. At this point, parents should get out of bed and take the child to the room, kiss the child quickly and leave. Be prepared to repeat this routine if necessary and drink coffee the next morning. If a child is sick or has a particularly bad dream, parents may decide that it's okay to change the rules. However, Mindell says it's better if the parent stays in the child's bedroom instead of letting the child into the parent's bedroom, as the child will have less trouble getting back to sleep.
2.3. Solve problems together Primary school age children are old enough to be able to reduce irrational fears. However, that does not mean that children no longer have concerns or worries. “Kids between the ages of five and eight worry a lot,” says Mindell. Taking time each day to talk about what worries your child can help prevent sleep disturbances from occurring. However, when the child enters the parent's bedroom and comes to your side of the bed, taking a moment for "crisis counseling" may help convince the child to go back to bed. For example, a mother with 3 children shared that, when her daughter was 5 years old, she used to fear a lot if a house fire broke out. To bring her back to her bedroom, she reminded her son that “This is our home, and they are equipped with an alarm if smoke appears”, and then she and her son planned to make a plan. escape in the worst case scenario.
2.4. Don't Offer Rewards With children entering the parent's bedroom late at night, rewards, stickers, new toys, or candies don't help because they don't address the underlying causes of the problem. Children may feel embarrassed when they don't get a reward. Therefore, it is better to give children more attention and closeness. Take the occasional nighttime awakening for granted and take time during the day to figure out what's causing your child to have trouble sleeping.
2.5. Set bedtimes for children To improve cooperation, involve children in decisions regarding sleep rules in the family. And of course parents and children will always be willing to negotiate with each other. Many children will stay in their own room as long as they know there is a specific time for spending time with their parents that has been built into the morning routine. Mindell gives an example: “If a parent insists that the child sleep in his or her own room until 7 a.m., but the child enters the parent's bedroom at 5 a.m., the compromise with the child can now go into the parent's room. Parents at 6 a.m. can help children enjoy this plan more. If your child can't see the clock yet, stick a piece of paper over the clock's minutes and use a marker to identify the agreed upon wake-up time. When the two numbers match, the child can get out of his room without problem.
2.6. Compromise Consider sharing the parent's bedroom with the child, not the bed. Children can be told that they are welcome and that sharing a bed with their parents is allowed, but they can sleep in their own sleeping bag or mat. After a few nights or weeks, a baby's own bed with a soft mattress may be more appealing to a younger child.
There are a few measures that can help cope with the child entering the parent's bedroom late at night such as eliminating sleep aids for the child, working with the child to solve problems that cause sleep difficulties, setting a wake-up time certain. However, it should be noted that no reward should be offered for solving any problem.
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Reference source: babycenter.com