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Posted by Doctor Ma Van Tham - Department of Pediatrics - Neonatology, Vinmec Phu Quoc International General Hospital
Of all the Deviant Behaviors, lying can be considered as one of the first. This deviant behavior is related to other behavioral problems, especially delinquency. Research on lying shows how to predict delinquency and other forms in adulthood.
1. Why do children lie?
Lying is an act that comes from a certain motive, which is expressed outwardly by verbal actions but is consistent with the inner psychological expression of the personality, carrying content that is not true to reality. intentionally given by the speaker.
Reasons children lie may include:
1.1 Children learn to lie
Author Charles Ford lied because he "learned" to know. This means that people are not born with a "lie gene". It is only after the age of 4 that children learn to lie.
Study by age, author Gervais et al. (2000) suggested that the frequency of lying behavior accumulates until the age of 7 years in a longitudinal direction. children aged 7 and 8 lied more often than children aged 6.
Lee and Ross (1997) also showed significant age-related differences in the content of a utterance. lie. As age increases, lies become more sophisticated
1.2 Is the perception of young children the same as adults?
Example 1:
The child said: The room was clean and tidy because the child thought that just moving some furniture would make the room tidy. Mom: suppose the room is still messy. The young mother lied. Example 2:
Child says: she doesn't love the child Parents: she punishes the whole class Child feels unfair with individual punishment while she punishes the collective Child thinks she hates the child more than others That's not necessarily It's true, but for children it's the truth. Adults and children see the truth differently. It's important to properly understand what your child feels and believe he or she feels. When the child says “I cleaned my room”, “the teacher intentionally punished the child” the child is not lying he is trying to tell the truth in his own way.
1.3 Children lie because they are programmed to answer correctly
For example: When a young mother asks her child "who do you love the most", her expectation will be that the answer is "I love you the most" when the child answers, then the mother will be very happy and express her feelings. in addition to letting children realize that. And similarly when grandma or dad... asked that question, the children all replied that they loved the person who asked that question.
1.4 Is it because parents are too strict that children lie?
Mother says: After school, children go out and don't come home right away to do homework Children hide their study results and say good grades Parents are too worried to be protective or too restrictive, repressing children who have a tendency to lie for freedom more and so that parents do not worry.
1.5 Lying can show imagination
A storyteller may be an imaginative child who wants to escape from a reality that is frustrating, uncomfortable, and disappointing. Inwardly, the child is aware that what he tells is not real, but he feels comfortable in the illusion.
Need to find out which children often lie to: to parents to get attention, to teachers to get attention.
2. Consequences of lying
Affecting the child's personality development Other deviant behaviors appear: theft, aggression, dropping out of school, fighting, suicide Criminal behavior Conclusion:
Lying is a deviant behavior most common in children, affecting the child's later personality development. The act of lying is called standard deviation when: "Lying to get things or favors, or to avoid obligations", is repeated continuously within 6 months. Adults and children see the truth differently. Parents who are too anxious to be protective or too restrictive and repressive are more likely to lie. Lying prevention is the job of families, schools, and the whole society.
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